Day: May 2, 2016

TICKTOCK that awful clock!!!!

It’s a dark day, we are all aloud to have them!

The countdown began Feb 15 2014. The giant clock appeared over my head and has never disappeared. Some days it is quieter but sometimes it ticks at a deafening tempo. I know I can’t focus on that stupid clock. Jesus knows I try but how can I ignore the fact that I am going to die, and sooner than expected. Yes, time is a gift but knowing and yet not knowing when the ball is going to drop is maddening!!!!

I try googling my stats dx @ 39, dx as metastatic dx with bone mets and lymph system etc. ect.  Just trying to find answers, hope. Tell me my specific prognosis!!!!!  The truth is, there is NO specific prognosis. I hate that, but I still search. I torture myself some days.

Cancer is as cancer does!

Shut up stupid clock!!  Please grant me the strength to quiet it’s piercing sound!!!